black bird.

I don't normally do "day summaries", but thinking creatively would drain the little life that is left in me.

So yesterday was this thing for the Daily Bruin where we elect next year's editor in chief. Kind of a big deal. A few friends and I from work decided to go to the 5.5-hour hearings trashed, and it was pretty much hilarious. Then I sobered up and it was as boring as I thought it would be.

Then, last night, there was this big party for the occassion, which had the potential to be amazing, but was actually quite tame and blah. I went back to John's apartment afterward and we talked for like an hour and a half. It was really nice.

Now I am just tired and I feel really weird and far away. I feel like I am about to lose all of these things that have been so important to me this year. All of the fourth-years that are graduating from the newspaper, John studying abroad, my decision not to run for Viewpoint Editor (and the implications of that decision, i.e. moving on to a real internship in the real world), Rebecca going abroad all year to France, just... everything. And I feel like next year Ill be starting from square one. Maybe it's a good thing, but it feels like a forced growing up-- a maturity thrown on me by some sort of outside source whose mission is to make me feel like nothing.